Please Note: For legal reasons we have been advised to use pseudonym's for this week's report. For members only here are the team codenames ;
Team: Peter 'Yoda' Furner, Darryl 'Exxon' Abbott, Jamie 'Bimbo' Freeland, Toby 'Tubs' Briggs, Ben 'Face Man' Fairclough, Alex 'Huge' Hewitt, Andrew 'Buckets' Tharp, Joseph 'Off Break' Lewis, Chris 'Lilly-pad' Lilford, Keith 'Seasoned Pro' Briggs, 'Colonel' William Parker.
Notable Batting: Ben 'Face Man' Fairclough 57, Jamie 'Bimbo' Freeland 41
Notable Bowling: Chris 'Lilly-pad' Lilford 5-26
Following a wretched start to the season, the MOGS travelled to the idyllic surroundings of Bushy Park to face Middlesex premier outfit Teddington. In search of a first win of the season things started well, as skipper 'Huge' won the toss and chose to bat in warm, cloudy conditions, a typical British Summer's day.
'Yoda' and 'Exxon' strode to the straw coloured wicket to be greeted by pace, bounce and sharp in-duckers that regularly threatened 'Exxon's' priceless and recently active crown jewels. All things considered it was merciful (at least for his family) that before long one such searing in-swinger accounted for Darryl's leg stump, leaving him the isolated pleasure of having played what many considered the shot of the day, a sumptuous cover drive off the giant 6ft 6in 14 year old with size 15 feet at the other end (of which more later...).
'Bimbo' joined 'Yoda' and the innings continued at a 'Furneresque' rate (Just ahead of Duckworth / Lewis) and MOGS were 31-1 after 10 overs. 'Huge' greeted each over from the distinctly hostile opposition captain with his 'quietly' motivational 'COME ON MOGS' cheer (last heard at Horsham 2004), whilst both batsman took blows to the chest, arm and pride. The change welcome change of bowling to his 13 year old brother however, serving up sweet, tossed up Leggies reminiscent of our beloved 'Major' (though approximately 50 years his junior), meant that the MOGS batsmen started to relax and play their shots. Usually a fatal but entertaining combination!
Predictibly, it did not go entirely the way it may have been planned, as 'Yoda' stepped back to a full length ball and could only chop it on to his stumps. 'Tubs' bounded to the wicket carrying his own garishly decorated blade (£9,99 to special friends) and after a subdued start bunted the increasingly tearful youngster for 3 huge sixes over long on. However, he blithely ignored a chorus of 'don't do it's' from watching team-mates and skied a fourth for Big Brother to take a simple catch.
'Face Man' joined 'Bimbo' who helpfully informed him that the short ball from the Asian medium pacer was 'not getting up'. He promptly went back to a ball that bounced like a demented space hopper, but luckily top edged over the keeper's head into no man's land for a lucky escape from which he would prosper. 'Bimbo' meanwhile gave in to acute self-hatred at his poor mid-pitch chat and crude inability to time a number of wild swipes and, deciding enough was enough, followed 'Tubs' cue by cue-ending the now beaming Leggie straight to Big Brother. MOGS approached the 25 over mark at 110-4.
MOGS master in charge 'Huge' now joined the 'Face Man', and not to be outdone by his peers, carried on where the two previous victims had left, by dispatching the Leggie for 2 even larger maximums over log on, one of which landed on the metal fence sending a deafening clang around the park, disturbing birds, bees and deer alike.
At this point umpire Hodge decided to chip in by insisting the adolescent Leggie had bowled his full complement when everybody else disagreed (perhaps he disagreed with the MOGS captain's harsh treatment?). Following a mid pitch conference with his opposite number, Steve retreated to the quiet back waters of square leg and the leggie continued his long apprenticeship to Majordom.
Meanwhile 'Face Man' was searing cover drives past fielders in the manner of Wayne Rooney past defenders, and with craftily taken singles also keeping the scoreboard ticking over, with 10 Overs left the Mogs were 147-4 with 'Huge' wanting 80-90 from the last 10.
Unfortunately 'Huge', 'Buckets' and the 'Off Break' all perished in the quest for quick runs but accompanied by the South African debutant 'Lilly Pad', 'Face Man' brought up a 50 of class not yet seen this season before taking an early bow in the penultimate over and being stumped for a fine 57. Further lusty blows from the 'Lilly Pad' - a name not in keeping with the coruscating power of his slog-sweeps - ensured that the MOGS reached their projected target of 234-9 from their allocated 40 Overs.
After a succulent but reasonably sparse tea, the MOGS took to the field counting among their number a full compliment of 10 bowlers, surely a first? (Well 9 if you take 'Yoda' and his car-killing off-breaks out of the equation - a decision that the 'Colonel' would no doubt support after the now infamous Brook incident...)
'Lilly Pad' Lilford and the 'Seasoned Pro' were given the new ball, and Teddington were soon in all sorts of trouble although MOGS quicklu suspected that their skipper had chosen his batting order with a game of pick up sticks.
The ruthless (but deceptively nick-named) 'Lilly Pad' simply ripped through the top order out, mixing seam and swing with a full searching length to regularly rattle the stumps. The office, looking like the England Slip cordon during the recent series against Bangladesh, had a full compliment of employees, awaiting the edges that never came as the Lilly Pad just kept on hitting the target.
In came, Teddington's hope, their star MCC batsmen, who greeted the Lilly Pad by smashing his first ball high over square leg for a maximum, only to try to try a repeat with a straight drive off his next ball, skying high into the covers where 'Huge' made no mistake.
At the other end, the 'Seasoned Pro' loosened up and bowled a near perfect off stump line. 'Buckets' lived up to his name swallowing the opportunity offered from a perfect out- swinger that took out the other opener, and the 'Pro' followed up with one that ducked back in to trap the next batsman plum in front. After just 15 overs Teddington were 49-7 (Game Over??)
No! In strode the above mentioned 14 year old giant who proceeded to give a demonstration of straight striking that had some MOGS searching their memory banks for comparisons (John Parker, Purley 1990?). The bounding 'Off Break' (a right arm seam bowler for all who don't know) then served up a sumptious leg stump half volley that disappeared high over the pavilion at midwicket, following up with a werewolf-like roar that sent deer droppings spraying all over the park. He then steamed in, cutting the batsmen in half with a fine reply, but his youthful opponent soon replied with more straight drives off front and back foot played with astonishing power
Teddington began to build a score, and with 13 overs left had progressed to 120-7 and still any result was possible. 'Huge' turned to his 'Bimbo' and 'Buckets'. Buckets teed one up on leg stump where the giant proceeded to time the ball too well the ball carrying 20 meters towards mid wicket where 'Tubs' swooped to take a magnificent 1 handed catch inches from the ground to end a threatening innings.
Bimbo charged in trying to scare the rabbits as the other end but the score board continued to tick over before a mistimed drive that gifted 'Tubs' a more straightforward catch at mid off, bringing 'Big Brother' and 'Little Together' with 95 needed from 10 overs.
'Huge' tried bowling himself but gave up quite quickly as the board rattled on and Teddington kept up with the rate. With 'Exxon' refusing an opportunity to finish off the job, the batsmen were threatened with 'Face Man' although Bimbo saved the MOGS embarrassment by nipping out Little Brother with the last ball of the 33rd over to leave Teddington 161 all out.
So, a first win of the season was obtained by the MOGS who retired to drink their opponents beer and drink to their good health in their mysterious absence (is their a player's bar that no-one told us about? With the season now well and truly kick-started, onwards to the Chairman's BBQ and Rottingdean where another win is long overdue!
MWCC Stats